Tuesday, December 8, 2009

It's been a little while...I hope everyone had a good Thanksgiving and is doing well on Finals (this week or next week). I'm currently doing a 24 hour fast as part of Kary's 12 month fast for his new book. I've never really fasted before so this is new to me. I mean I've done lent fasts where I gave up T.V. or candy or something, but to be honest, I did it cause it was a big deal to say you gave up something for lent...not because I understood the purpose behind a fast.

So today God's spirit is my nourishment. Shouldn't that be the way it is everyday? Sure, we need food and water to live in our physical bodies, but to really live we need spiritual nourishment. We have to be healthy in spirit and I believe the only way to do that is through God. I've only been awake for 5 hours today so far and I'm already getting really hungry. It's going to be hard to make it another 9.5 hours, and to be honest I probably wouldn't have the will power to do it alone. That is what is great about this...the only way I can make it through this day without eating my arm is by depending on God for strength and resolve - and the most beautiful thing of all is that He is faithful and WILL be that strength.

As part of the fast Kary has asked me (anyone doing it) to spend at least a half hour in prayer, which I have not done yet. (I will though, don't worry) I have been doing some reflecting though and realized I am addicted to sin. Sin controls a lot of my life and 2 Peter 2:19 says, "...For you are a slave to whatever controls you." I am so comfortable in the mindset I have had my entire life, which falls short of the life Christ demands ALL the time, and it's created a rut that has prevented the kind of progress I am capable of in my walk. Romans 6:16 tells a similar story to the one in 2 Peter, but reminds us that we still have a choice. "Don't you realize you are a slave to whatever you choose to obey? You can be a slave to sin, which leads to death, or you can choose to obey God, which leads to righteous living."

For those of you who don't know I was confirmed in the Catholic faith in eighth grade, but didn't really grasp what that meant because I didn't really engage myself in what the church had been teaching me. I mean, I knew the answers, but my heart wasn't there. In the 9th grade I started going to Grace's youth group and within a couple months felt my heart was ready to accept Christ. I had a much better understanding of what was going on and where I stood, but now I see I still wasn't ready. I didn't appreciate the life and mindset that was required of that acceptance. So even though I had accepted Christ into my heart, I was still choosing to obey sin: pride, greed, anger, jealousy, so on. While those things weren't necessarily controlling my relationships, they were still controlling my heart.

As I've talked about in previous entries, this Christian thing is more about a journey than that end destination. Getting saved isn't a something you do one day and check off your bucketlist...it's about running the life marathon with Christ. I've never ran a marathon before (or even close) but I know that is physically draining. We're not supposed to run through life depending on our own strength. If you do, you won't get out alive.

So today I'm starting with a clean slate because I know I can. And by the end of the day I will have failed again - numerous times. But God tells us that we can be clean. 1 John 1:9, "But if we confess our sins to Him, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness." Today I'm coming clean before God and I encourage you to do the same. I'm going to strive for constant improvement towards obedience to God.

That's all I got for now. I hope everyone has a good week.

Peace and blessings,
Adam

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