FragileHands

So tonight was mirror lake night. Crazy to say the least. It was a good 10 degrees warmer than the last two years, which made it nice. The ground was muddy, and the people were drunk. I was actually there to pass out hot chocolate, I didn't intend to jump and I stayed true to that intention. It was funny to see a bunch of the football players stand in a big group and take it all in (cool that Pryor and Posey both got hot chocolate though). I eventually got frustrated though cause people were splashing in the mud and throwing it. I made the bad decision of white shoes, and white track pants....so I was of course annoyed that both are potentially ruined. However looking back, this kind of thing shouldn't be annoying to me. I just need to have the right heart set. I was there to try to be a servant (which I would say overall I failed at, but the H20 people in general did a great job) and I walked away feeling angry. Clearly not how God would want others to perceive someone that is there on His behalf.

I'm learning, slowly, that getting the right heart set is about more than just wanting it. It's not under our control...it's under God's, just like everything else. Yes, we do have to want it. But, we need to pray about it, and have faith and eventually God will mold our hearts and shape them the way He wants them to be. He will put on them the desires He wants us to pursue, the paths He wants us to follow. Obviously, as humans, we will never have perfect hearts. This is probably the single hardest thing for me to accept. I know that I'm not perfect and never can be. Sometimes I feel I'm about as far from perfect as somebody can get...but I have an appetite for perfection. I want so badly to live my life without making mistakes and I dwell on everything that I screw up, whether big or small. But God doesn't want me or anyone to think that way. Yes try as hard as you can to live like Christ, but in the end know and accept that you will always fall short and accept the Amazing Grace that is God's unconditional love for everyone of us. When I was talking to one of my friends recently, they pointed out to me how important it is to remember that we are God's masterpiece. We shouldn't lose heart in our mistakes, but rather, learn from them, and praise God for His redeeming spirit. It is through our weakness that God can be most glorified.

Peace and blessings,

Adam

P.E.F. OSU 31, Mich 23. High scoring, I know. I'm going out on a limb, we'll see what happens.

P.S. Loving the song Stellar by Incubus right now. Listen to it!